Art of Life : X-Japan
Lyrics by YOSHIKI

Desert Rose
Why do you live alone
If you are sad
I'll make you leave this life
Are you white blue or bloody red
All I see is drowning in cold grey sand

The winds of time
You knock me to the ground
I'm dying of thirst
I wanna run away
I dont know how to set me free to live
My mind cries out feeling pain

I've been roaming to find myself
How long have I been feeling endless hurt
Falling down rain flows into my heart
In the pain I'm waiting for you
Cant go back
No place to go back to
Life is lost. Flowers fall
If its all dreams
Now wake me up
If its all real
Just kill me

I'm making the wall inside my heart
I dont wanna let my emotions get out
It scares me to look at the world
Dont wanna find myself lost in your eyes
I've tried to drown my past in grey
I never wanna feel more pain
Run away from you with out saying any words
What I dont wanna lose is love

Through my eyes time goes by like tears
My emotions losing the color of life
Kill my heart
Release all my pain
I'm shouting out loud
Insanity takes hold over of me

Turning away from the wall
Nothing I can see
The scream deep inside
reflecting another person in my heart
He calls me from within
"All existance you see before you must be wiped out :
Dream, Reality, Memories,
and yourself"

I begin to lose control of myself
My lust is so blind, destroys my mind
Nobody can stop my turning to madness
No matter how you try to hold me in your heart
Why do you wanna raise these walls
I dont know the meaning of hatred
My brain gets blown away hearing the words of lies
I only want to hold your love

Stab the dolls filled with hate
Wash your self in their blood
Drive to the raging current of time
Swing your murderous weapon into the belly
"the earth"
Shout and start creating confusion
Shed your blood for pleasure
And what? For love?
What am I supossed to do?

I believe in the madness called "Now"
Past and future prison my heart
Time is Blind
But I wanna trace my love
on the walls of time over pain in my heart

Art of life
Insane blade stabbing dreams
Try to break the truth now
But I cant heal this broken heart in pain
Cannot start to live, Cannot end my life
Keep on crying

Close my Eyes
Time breathes I can hear
All love and sadness melt in my heart
Dry my tears
Wipe my bloody face
I wanna feel me living my life outside my walls

You cant drive of yesterday, so
You're painting your heart with your blood
You cant say "No"
Only turning the wheel of time
with a rope around your neck
You build a wall of mortality and take a breath
from between the bricks
You make up imaginary enemies and are chased by them
Yor're trying to commit suicide
You're satisfied with your prologue
Now your painting your first chapter black
You are putting the scraps of life together
and trying to make an asylum for yourself
You're hitting a bell at the edge of the stage and
You are trying to kill me

I beleive in the madness called "Now"
Time goes flowing, breaking my heart
Wanna live
Cant let my heart kill myself
Still I haven't found what I'm looking for

Art of life
I try to stop myself
But my heart goes to destroying the truth
Tell me why
I want the meaning of my life
Do I try to live, Do I try to love
in my dream

I'm breaking the wall inside my heart
I just wanna let my emotions get out
Nobody can stop
I'm running to freedom
No matter how you try to hold me in your world
Like a doll carried by the flow of time
I sacraficed the present moment for the future
I was inchains of memory half-blinded
Losing my heart, walking in the sea of dreams

Close my eyes
Rose breathes I can hear
All love and sadness melt in my heart
Dry my tears
Wipe my bloody face
I wanna feel me living my life
outside my mind

Dreams can make me mad
I can't leave my dream
I can't stop myself
Don't know what I am
What lies are truth?
What truths are lies?

I believe in the madness called "Now"
Time goes flowing breaking my heart
Wanna live
Cant let my heart kill myself
Still I havent found what I'm looking for

Art of life
I try to stop myself
But my heart goes to destroying the truth
Tell me why
I want the meaning of my life
Do I try to live, Do I try to love

Art of life
An Eternal Bleeding heart
You never wanna breath you last
Wanna live
Can't let my heat kill myself
Still I'm felling for
A Rose is breathing love
in my life

I've been away...well, from updating the blog and stuffs for a while because of the group project that lasts for a semester, while the last week was the toughest part because we all stayed in the lab for more than 48 hours consecutively >< anyhow, it's all over.. tomorrow will be the last mission, to give a demonstration of the program we wrote. Thanks for all the hard work and all the best to all group members. I enjoyed the time working with them a lot.. although tired, but what an experience!!

This week, my time will be pretty much occupied by the Networking revision and Multimedia revision.. Multimedia is so so.. not that bad, although I haven't even start it yet, but since we all had past experience of VR paper, we kinda know how the exam was lay out.. and the notes were appropriate amount..
But Networking!! Oh Networking... what a hell subject..
Seeing the book alone make me don't even want to lift it.. It's too heavy, boring, and blah blah..
30 chapters altogether, >< and the bad thing is we need them all (oh except one chapter, like that helps..)

So this week, I assume that I will be quite busy reading again, until next Wednesday!!! (last day of exam!)

Another news is I've finally applied for membership at FTP download anime website .. hu hu hu, so glad that finally I made a decision, 15USD per 3 months, in fact it's kinda cheap comparing to the amount I download... I've been downloading more than 15 GB in total since the last 2 days.. got 4 full Japanese series (10 or 11 episodes each) and some animes.. my life is so happy now, filled with these entertainment stuffs..Although I have to manage my time to study and watch these ... wish I can spend the whole day just watching these series

It's quite strange because when I was in Thailand, I never even bother to turn on TV to watch these Jap series, while all my friends crazy about them all the time.. now I'm the one who is crazy for it.. lol things can be change over time.

I've found that KIMUTAKU is a great actor.. >_< can't believe I'm admitting this but I really like his acting. My best fav since I've been watched is series called Good Luck (2003), well, out of all I've watched completely..

Until now I've watched

Densha Otoko
Orange Days
Kimi wa Petto
Beautiful Life
Pride
Good Luck

All that is waiting for me to watch and all the series that I've skimmed through

Long Vacation *(skimmed through)
Hero
Slow Dance
Engine
Lunch Queen
Itsumo Futari De
Koukou Kyoushi

ETC...

Can't wait till next week after I finish my exam!!

PS: Recently (well, 2 days ago) Yoshiki has been updating his blog again, this time he wrote in VUK space >< Really miss him... well I'll copy and paste his msg here then (only for the 2 recent blogs)

* * * * * YOSHIKI BLOG MESSAGE* * * * *

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Monday, May 15, 2006